Martin Mundt

So Here’s The Thing
by Martin Mundt
© 2007 by Martin Mundt
All Rights Reserved.
Episode 7: $87,500,000
So here’s the thing—I’ve been getting these on my fax machine, and the more I think about it, the better it sounds. What do you think?
Federal Republic of Nigeria:
Special Cash Disbursement Unto Foreigners Assistance Department, Tel/Fax 256-1-1159857 ext. 18, Suite 234
Dr. [...]

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So Here’s The Thing
by Martin Mundt
© 2007 by Martin Mundt
All Rights Reserved.
Episode 7: The Chicken Killers
So here’s the thing—if El Pollo ever had a friend, then surely that friend was I. So, if I would not do what had to be done, then who would?
But first, before you answer that question, let me tell [...]

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So Here’s The Thing
by Martin Mundt
© 2007 by Martin Mundt
All Rights Reserved.

Episode 6: El Pollo

So here’s the thing—I will now tell you what happened, but you will not believe me, and that is as it should be. You will say: that old man, he is a liar, or loco, or worse. Or, if [...]

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So Here’s The Thing
by Martin Mundt
© 2007 by Martin Mundt
All Rights Reserved.

Episode 5: Live Poultry
So here’s the thing—I have discovered the two most terrifying words in the English language: live poultry.
The man entered my store, setting the bell jangling, and I knew instantly that there would be trouble.
“You sell live poultry.” The man did [...]

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So Here’s The Thingby Martin Mundt
© 2007 by Martin MundtAll Rights Reserved.

Episode 4: Easter
So here’s the thing—send me money. (Preferably nothing smaller than tens.)
Okay, fine, I’ll explain if I have to. (Everyone’s so suspicious these days.)
It all started—my new life, I mean, my new life because of which you should send me money—my [...]

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So Here’s The Thing
by Martin Mundt
© 2007 by Martin Mundt
All Rights Reserved
Episode 3: Imagine
So here’s the thing—I love women who lie.
She sits next to me at the bar. She’s young and beautiful. Goes without saying, right? Story’s not worth telling otherwise. She orders a drink. I don’t remember what kind. [...]

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So Here’s the Thing
by Martin Mundt
© 2007 by Martin Mundt
All Rights Reserved
Episode Two: Lost Dog
So here’s the thing—I just hate seeing those “Lost Dog” posters tacked up around the neighborhood, because the sense of loss and sadness in those fuzzy snapshots and terse descriptions of people’s pets just radiates off the paper, and also you [...]

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So Here’s The Thing
by Martin Mundt
Episode One: Hell
So here’s the thing—I’ll try anything once. That is, after all, how I ended up strangling a dachshund with my bare hands when I was fourteen; and that’s why I held my mouth open under the oak tree in my back yard when I was fifteen until [...]

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